Bloodthirsty Mini Gnome

This isn’t your grandma’s cheery lawn ornament. These miniature gnomes look like they’ve just finished tearing apart a neighborhood squirrel—or possibly something larger. Splattered in crimson, with blank little eyes that suggest absolutely no remorse, they’re the perfect way to let the neighbors know you’ve given up on normal landscaping.

Each one is hand-painted, and no two bloodbaths are alike. They’re sold at random, so you don’t get to pick your gnome—your gnome picks you. Consider it less of a purchase and more of an adoption with an ominous twist.

Perfect for desks, shelves, or any tiny patch of earth that needs a very small but very aggressive guardian.

Mini size. Maximum murder vibes.